Last year whilst reading a passage in “The Untethered Soul” a major switch in perception was birthed. The following passage shook me to the core & was the beginning of something very integral to my being.

“Imagine that you have a thorn in your arm that directly touches a nerve. When the thorn is touched, it’s very painful. Because it hurts so much, the thorn is a serious problem. It’s difficult to sleep because you roll over on it. It’s hard to get close to people because they might touch it. It makes your daily life very difficult. You can’t even go for a walk in the woods because you might brush the thorn against the branches. This thorn is a constant source of disturbance, and to solve the problem you have two choices.”

The two choices being:

1. Decide that it’s so disturbing when things touch the thorn that you make sure nothing ever touches it.

2. Decide that since it’s so disturbing when things touch the thorn, it’s imperative that you remove it.

Whatever you decide will determine much of the course of your life.
If you go with the first choice, making sure the thorn is never disturbed, you end up creating a life built around this thorn. You adjust your surroundings to make sure the thorn isn’t disturbed.
The truth is, the thorn completely runs your entire life. It affects all your decisions, including where you go, whom you’re comfortable with, and who’s comfortable with you. It determines what house you can live in, and what kind of bed you can sleep on at night. When it’s all said and done, that thorn is running every aspect of your life. It turns out that the life of protecting yourself form the problem becomes a perfect reflection of the problem itself.

This reading brought with it an awareness of what I was covering up with rules, quick fixes & bandaids. Alas, one can know something at an intellectual level and not be ready to practice at an experiential level…

A couple of weeks ago, after returning home from the most beautiful, carefree time in New Zealand, I felt pain surfacing once more & this bothered me to the core.
How could i go from experiencing such ecstasy, love & gratitude to feelings of pure pain?
This time, I wasn’t hosting the energy to use my normal suppression method.
So I decided to try a new avenue. ASKING FOR HELP.

After the breakdown that my brother calls “The Breakthrough”, I wrote about it, cried about it, screamed about it, sat with it and held myself accountable to making a serious change and embracing said change as an agent for growth.
On that day, the thorn lost an unbelievable amount of grip and I felt a lightness I hadn’t t felt in years.

What i learnt:

Facing tough times when they present themselves is beneficial as hell & saves much time and energy
Speaking up is the wiser thing to do. As ’small’ as it may seem, It’s always better to verbalise & to listen to those whose opinions you value most
You can brush things aside as much as you want but they’ll re surface
Acknowledging is essential to moving past
It’s completely normal to not feel that zest permanently. We ALL go through periods of darkness
Turbulent times are imperative for growth. In order to grow, you must give up the struggle to remain the same, and learn to embrace change at all times